Ask yourself, what do women like better than chocolate? Is it some shiny dress they feel like a queen in? Hugh Grant on some romantic comedy perhaps? They may be mother nature’s greatest mystery, their likes and priorities may be a puzzle even for the most experienced of men but one thing is for sure. Women want men to be better in bed. Better than they were the last time, better than the boyfriends they had before, better than they’d wish for and ideally… better than Hugh Grant!
It’s multiple orgasms women want more than chocolate. And learning how to be better in bed the next time will get you closer to fulfilling that demand of hers. What I did to write this article was to visit several forums and magazines women hang out to, take a thorough look at their comments, concerns and point of view overall. Based on that research and personal experience, here’s the top 10 things you can do to be better in bed and have your partner experience the thrill of multiple orgasms. The list is ascending (gets better as you move on).
1. Dirty Talk?
Dirty talk is something most women, unlike what seems to be common belief, don’t like at all. In fact, chances are they are laughing inside. Especially if you’re not a natural dirty talker. Thus, you want to keep a distance from talking dirty unless asked otherwise. In the unlikely case that happens, make sure you feel comfortable with the whole thing. Sounding in-confident, insecure about what you say and do is something you want to avoid at all costs. If you don’t think you can pull it off, try compensating some other way if possible. Or keep it to a minimum and try “sophisticated” stuff that you feel somewhat comfortable saying.
2. Questions And Answers
Now what does that have to do with you being better in bed? Well, although playing questions and answers is a popular activity overall, as a man, you should refrain from asking questions in the bedroom. If you do, you’ll be sending the wrong signals to her: “Was it good for you?“, “Did I do that right?“, “What do you want me to do next?“. Stuff like that will give your partner the impression you are inexperienced, anything but confident, needy, you name it! A man knowing his way around wouldn’t ask questions, would he?
Instead, to be better in bed, you need to master the art of eye contact and body language. She may be reluctant to tell you what she wants but she will definitely show you. Keep an eye on her reactions. If you feel she’s enjoying whatever it is you’re doing, if you see her let go of herself, keep it up; you’re in the right direction. Similarly, watch for signals of discomfort and adjust your actions as necessary.
3. Experiment In Moderation
Trying new things in your sex life is great. In fact, it is necessary. It helps maintain a healthy, interesting sex life. However, trying too much to be a Kama Sutra god does ring a bell regarding your ability to keep it up for long. Let her digest your new moves before trying out something new. Do that as a precaution; reveal your aces to her periodically in order to keep her hooked and interested in you for the foreseeable future. As time goes by and you learn and apply new moves, try fading out some of your old ones. Reintroduce them to her later on; when old moves are old enough to feel like new and fresh ones.
Another good reason for you to be moderate with experimentation is that she may or may not like or be ready for whatever new it is you have to… offer. Keep that in mind and don’t push her to do things she doesn’t want to do.
4. Adopt Variety To Be Better In Bed For Her
We were just talking about experimenting and doing so in moderation. Experimenting with new moves and positions certainly serves variety. You’ll also want to mix and match moves and positions, constantly coming up with new combinations; don’t go over the same things in the same order. Variety isn’t all about the moves you’re making though, it’s also about how you make them. To be better in bed as a man, experiment with different sexual, instinctual attitudes as well. Go easy and slow on her at a point, be decisive and fast at another. Be gentle or be tense, be romantic or cynical; present different personalities by letting your instincts free. Do that as she allows. Be alert though. Some times, she may seem like she doesn’t want this or that when in fact she does. That’s part of the game where she actually expects you to play the role of the “bad guy“.
Women are widely known to cry on the good guy’s shoulder for the bad guy’s behavior. To be better in bed and be a better man overall, you need to somehow manage to be BOTH guys. Be there when she needs the good guy, be there when she needs the bad guy. Both in the bedroom and outside of it.
To further serve this aspect of your sex life, move away from the bedroom. Try different places inside and outside of the house (within reason).
5. Let Her Take Control
Let her hop on and just enjoy her moves. You should stay still and let her enjoy herself till she loses her stamina. At that point, either help her movement (hold her buttocks) or, should she signal you to, roll her over and find yourself on top once more.
6. Careful With Your Fingers
It’s probably the films to blame for the opposite belief but women don’t like more than one or two of your fingers inside them. Well, 99% of them aren’t. And to be better in bed you need to abide by their likes. Use your fingers to stimulate the clitoris. Do that really slowly and gently or you are more likely to tickle her rather than stimulate her. Only when she’s wet and ready, should you put your fingers inside of her. And that is something you should do in scale. One first, then the second.
7. Sex Duration
Most women think of ideal sex to last between 10 and 30 minutes. Anything below 10 minutes will probably leave a woman unsatisfied. If you can’t last as long, you should learn more about how to stop premature ejaculation and last longer in bed. If you push it though and force duration to over 30 minutes, chances are she’ll start feeling tired and bored. Both severe deal breakers. Less is better sometimes.
8. Use Foreplay
You should start encounters using foreplay, especially with experienced women. You must know by now that women don’t get aroused as easily as men do. This is why using foreplay is so important. Use your hands and lips to get her excited, wet and ready for penetration. Take your time and do not let her know that you’re anxiously awaiting for the next step because you might disorient her and thus, delay her arousal. For that same reason, be gentle at this stage, do not suck her nipples or do anything that causes noise (they almost never like that). Explore and study her body, find the spots that trigger her and keep stroking them in rotation. It would be a good idea to engage the spots you find throughout the sexual act, always in moderation.
9. Your Thrusts
When she’s ready, you may start thrusting. You should use a combination of deep and shallow thrusts. Start with the later, apply 10-15 of them or more, as you see fit. Continue with deep thrusts after that. Shallow trusts at this point are a well-meant torture for her. Use that in your advantage, deprive her of the deep thrusts she seeks, get her to anticipate them in agony and then just give her what she wants. Be cautious, don’t go over the top with shallow thrusts. At some point, you have to give in to her will. Before she loses excitement.
10. Her Inner Self
To be better in bed for her and overall a better man in your life and hers, you’ll need to understand her inner self. Embrace her instincts, explore her biased thoughts, find out what ticks her and what doesn’t. May or may not sound cheesy; it works wonders.
Women have a strong sense when it comes down to scouting for men that can offer them safety. Now, most people associate that with money or muscles but that’s neither near nor there true. What they are looking for is emotional safety, a sense of it, if you will. Managing to establish yourself as a protective, overwhelming presence will trigger her emotions in unimaginable ways. Instinctively, women have associated that sense of safety with several aspects of their sex life as well. Your palms holding the two sides of her belly is one of them. Do that when she’s on top of you, applying non painful pressure.
Look her deeply in the eyes, let her know that you’re there for her no matter what. Position yourself as an alpha male. Then teach her to explore her instincts, enhance her sexuality and femininity. Do not be jealous and encourage her to look more sexy and beautiful even if it means more heads will be turning around to stare at your girlfriend. Don’t worry, being the one to teach her that will make you nearly irresistible to her.
Doing that has many positive side effects. For one thing, she will be available to discuss fantasies; both yours and hers. No matter how straitlaced she might have been when you first met her. That alone can excessively spice up your sex life.
Now go and be better in bed tonight.